Jet Setting Jasmine wears many hats and we’re always keen for a headwear fashion show. We sat down with the mother turned clinical therapist turned pornstar extraordinaire to discuss therapy and healing, the sustainability of sex work and the intersections of being a Black performer in the industry.
Besides being an esteemed adult actress, you also hold a Masters of Clinical Social Work. What inspired you down this path?
I was a young mother, I was in a domestic violence relationship, and I was trying to finish school, and explore the different resources that would allow me to do that. I was leaning on these resources that were put in place to support those different intersections, and they were all failing me miserably. Trying to get assistance to take care of my child and finish school, I was being told that I needed to stop going to school, I needed to start working a full-time job. I really felt unheard by these "resources" that were supposed to be available. I realized that I could do a better job serving, and I did do a better job at advocating for myself and serving myself. I went ahead and I pursued the degree in sociology. The different support systems that were supposedly in place to support me that failed helped me identify that I had a purpose to help people through the many different challenges that life will throw at you.
What was one of the biggest realizations that you made about yourself when you were studying to become a therapist?
One of the biggest realizations is that you don't have to experience the things that your clients are experiencing to be empathetic and to be helpful. At first, I thought, "I'm gonna work with myself”, you know people like me, and I actually found such a love for working with the geriatric population. I learnt how things that were presented in our childhood, if not addressed, corrected, or cared for, continue to show up all the way to end of life care. Learning how to be able to support people, although I may not have had those type of life experiences, but to me, accepting that and understanding that has made me a stronger clinician.
With your Masters in Gerontology, are there any unique issues that older people face with intimacy?
As a clinician, I noticed that everyone was addressing everything around intimacy, so medication, safety, thoughts about getting older, but very little about relationships. I recall working with veterans and the doctors would say "Oh, the surgery went well. This is how you manage all the medication." And then when I would sit with them and ask, "Is there anything else that we didn't cover that you're concerned about, things that maybe, you know, you wanna talk about that's just not in these discharge papers?" And the spouses will go, "Is it okay to, like, touch them? Is it okay for us to have sex? Or am I going to like hurt anything?" And those are the reasons why people want to live! It’s their relationships! When you ask them “Why are you having this surgery that's gonna extend your life?" "It's because I wanna be here for my grandchildren, I wanna be here for my wife, I wanna be here for my partner." But then we don't teach them how to sustain those relationships after they have such a significant change to their medical care. So I got super interested in how we maintain and sustain post illness or injury, and how are we proactively looking at aging and intimacy over time, even as young people.
courtesy of Island Boi Joey
On the podcast that you did with Asa Akira, you talk about intimacy as a key to happiness. Besides sex, what are other forms of intimacy that give people meaning?
Everything that happens before and after sex can be considered intimacy. Sex is just one of those things, but how do you get to the point of deciding that this is someone that you wanna engage with physically? Some people will say " a 10-minute date is okay. Now, I wanna hook up with you." In that 10 minute, what happened? What transferred? What was the connection? That's intimacy for you at least in that setting. After, do you call me? Do you ask "Hey, let's get something to eat?” or “Oh, can I get that wet rag for you?" That’s intimacy, it's showing care and concern.
I think we also learned a lot about intimacy in the last two years, where physical contact has been challenged by COVID. I've heard people say “this person calls and checks up on me, and it really means a lot to me." We're learning that intimacy can mean how we connect. People watching shows across the country together, that is finding creative ways to be intimate with one another. I feel like having a meaningful conversation about anything is sharing who you are, sharing your innermost thoughts with someone else, that is an incredible form of intimacy that sometimes gets overlooked.
As a therapist what are common questions that you get from sex workers?
“Is this work sustainable?” is something models in the industry waffle with all the time. There really isn't a succession plan in this industry like there is for other professions. One of the things that I find myself speaking about whether individually or on a larger scale, is how do you sustain your career in this industry? This kind of goes back to my background in gerontology, I’ll ask, ‘what does this job look like to you, or this industry look like to you in 10 years? What are you producing now that you can see yourself participating in for the longevity of your career?’ Models often contemplate ‘What if I wanna start a family, or when and if my body changes, or if I just don't wanna be in front of the camera anymore?’ They should also ask themselves “what other skills am I learning so I can still have a stake in this industry? How can I get the benefits of having this incredibly unique skill set that no one else in the world has in the way that adult content creators do?"
Even the skill set of working with our clients; yes, we do produce content, they enjoy it, but it's very rare that we have these one and done experiences with people who see our content. There's relationship building, there's coaching that takes place, there is help, there are some life-saving things that happen on Pornhub. Our clients share things with us on these platforms, and we take the time and walk them through it to the best of our ability. Whether it's just being a supportive listener, or giving them a space to actually engage with another human being, it’s invaluable.
It's important to me that when models are sharing the challenges that they're having with the industry, I can broaden their perspective around, ‘what else is there to get from this industry?’ Because God knows you give so much to it.
What are common questions that you get from BIPOC sex workers?
For Black content creators, some major barriers that we talk about are the barriers to that sustainability. I can have that same conversation about sustainability with two models, and for one that is white, they’re more likely to say "I could possibly do all of those things!’ With a content creator that is black or a person of color, there's some additional barriers to being able to have that same sort of outlook and trajectory.
This is where our industry is synonymous with any other industry, especially in America, where we have to worry about how all of our intersections will impact our possibilities for opportunities. If I wanna say, "Hey, Company X, I may not be the most popular girl on your site, but I'm really good at X, Y and Z, and I really want a mentorship, or I really wanna have a collaboration," there is something inherently that I have to be mindful of, I don't fit the beauty standard of our current culture, and so I may be overlooked in one department, which causes me to be overlooked in another department.
I've heard many people say to me directly, "people don't really buy your content in the same way, or people are not looking for your perspective," and I find that incredibly hard to believe. Pornhub does some excellent statistics of their viewers that I look at every year and whether interracial, or a subset of some genre that includes people of color, those are one of the highest viewed content areas. So that tells me, we are incredibly valuable to this industry, not only in front of the camera, but from a business perspective. There is incredible value to the way we can lend our expertise, our cultural expertise, and our orientation on life; this plays in again with that relationship building.
I find it to be incredibly important from the emotional aspect because so many people will sacrifice a lot to be in this industry; your family doesn't agree with you, you may have lost your job, friends don't agree with you etc. and then you're in this industry that will turn you over very quickly, so helping people find their footing in something that they have sacrificed a lot for is really important to me.
courtesy of Tarrice Love
Fetishization of Black bodies is something we often hear about in pornography. Can you help make sense of this issue?
The definition to fetishize something is to objectify it. A human is not an object, right? When people say, "I have a fetish for a black person," it's like, "No, you're just racist”. When you say you have a “black fetish” you commodify a person to an object to be utilized for something. And what is the biggest example of that? Well, slavery, right, where we were dehumanized and made as a commodity. And those fetishes are usually based on very stereotypical racial tropes.
What advice would you have for sex workers who feel like they're being fetishized? How can someone address that?
I think that one is validating your experience. We cannot take our cues from people that are, whether intentionally or unintentionally being abusive in language, or behavior, or approach towards us. You need to take your cues from your internal feeling. Before being in the adult industry, you've been a person of color, you've been a black person, you've been an Asian person, so you've had these experiences already to validate when something doesn't feel right, based on race.
The next step is allowing people the opportunity to decide, do you want to provide education? That's up to you. Do you want to address it? That is up to you. Do you need to weigh the pros and the cons of speaking out on your own behalf of advocating for yourself? I think it is important for us to understand that just because something is being done wrong, there's a lot that we must weigh as black people if we speak up or not; you don’t know if speaking out is gonna cost you your client or career.
When we can, we should say "Hey, when I'm presented this way, it makes me feel like I'm being objectified, and you may not have that perspective, because you are a white person, and you're following the template that has been laid down for many years. This, if we can just pivot and present me in this way, it will feel more humanizing, and it actually puts this business or this company in a much better position." We must consider how to balance an opportunity with our humanity.
Since you and King Noire partnered up to launch Royal Fetish Films, do you believe the industry has improved in terms of how black people are being represented, and where does it still fall short?
I don’t want to praise the industry for being less obvious about their exploitation or for being performative. I think we will know the industry has changed when we look at the homepage of a porn site and it looks more representative of the world that we live in. When our leadership looks like the rest of the consumers that we serve, then we're making change.
Since King and I have started our film company we created an opportunity for people to see how they can create something of their own. There are instances of "Okay, these companies won't hire you, they won't dress you and costume you and give you roles that you feel comfortable and sexy in, then you can create your own!” It's been really cool to watch over the last 10, 11 years now, people that were in my DM saying like, "Oh, my gosh, you're so crazy, but I love it," are now going, "Hey, look at my channel. I'm doing it."
Companies, however, that are like, "Hey, we did this feature with this black person, isn't it cool?" I'm like, "What does your leadership board look like? Who are the directors of that film? Who are the writers of the script?" And that's, again, going back to the sustainability and the longevity in this industry. By giving me a scene that wouldn't have been there historically, I think, "Great, I'm one model that gets paid a nice amount and gets more likes on Twitter." That's great. Is that really gonna sustain me in this industry long term? No. But by saying, "Hey, that scene was great. We would like to invite you or someone else that is directing and is a person of color, or is a woman to partner with us in our behind the scenes," you know, that to me, that's changing the industry.
Keep up with Jet Setting Jasmine on Twitter: @JetSetJasmine Instagram: @JetSetJasmine & her website.
See Jet Setting Jasmine's latest projects: Queen's Command Adult Toy line in collaboration with Lust Arts, "Layers of Lust" Deluxe Convertible Strap-On Harness & Nenefemhealth Ambassador & Spokeswoman
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